Sleepover Dilemma

I have been a mom for over twenty years. There is not much I have not experienced in this department or had a close friend experience. One thing I know for certain is every child is different. When you assume they are the same, you will quickly be proven wrong. What one child likes, another will not. That is just life. You roll with the punches and evolve as needed.  Do your children sleepover at their friend’s houses? My boys went to the odd sleepover but really never were into it. My oldest daughter loved having friends over and would often spend the night at their house as well. Each was different. With the boys I remember driving through a storm to pick one up at midnight as he wanted to come home. But my daughter never had an issue. She was very social and loved hanging with friends. We did have one girl get home sick and needed her mom to get her though. I guess it is expected as kids go through this stage of their life.

Each is different.

Now our youngest has been having sleepovers for a couple of years now. We know her friend’s parents very well and they are all great. But for some reason, twice she has wanted to come home. Once at midnight and the other time it was 1:30 AM. She had slept at both of these friend’s houses before with no issues. I am unsure if they were just really wired or she was home sick. Of course her friends were sad. But their parents understood and have invited her back. I just think we will be taking a break.

She loves hanging out with her family. She loves hanging out with her friends. But when all the fun is over I think she just likes to be home in her own bed. She has went to birthday parties with sleepovers that had many kids as well as just her and a friend. She always calls before bed to say goodnight and it gives us the chance to make sure she is doing ok.

But when the excitement slows down she misses home.

A few of her friends are still not ready for sleepovers. They love the idea of it but seem to shy away from staying away from home. Personally I never sleep well when she is not home. I still do not sleep well if my teens are not home.

Yesterday when I was out with my youngest daughter,she mentioned having a sleepover a gain. I told her for now, maybe having friends at our house is best. She can go on play-dates but I think sleeping away from home needs to be put on hold for a bit. I know she was upset. Maybe just having slumber parties at her big sis’s place for now will do.

Funny how kids go through stages.

I do not want her to feel she is being punished because she is not. But I do not want her to have the stress of missing home. I don’t want to worry and inconvenience the other parents if she changes her mind. See my dilemma?

Do your children go on sleepovers? Have they ever called to come home int he middle of the night? I would love to hear about your experiences.


  1. It truly is a phase that they go through … and I think that once you open up the avenue of having sleepovers at HER house instead of her having to go somewhere else that will all change.

    Both of my teenage boys went through the exact same thing. They would be spending the night at a friend’s house and then all of a sudden at 1AM or 2AM there’s a knock on the door and there’s my kid – wanting to come in and sleep in his own bed. (Their sleepovers were at friends’ apartments in our complex – literally across the parking lot lol)

    If I remember correctly – mine went through this stage between the ages of 10-12. Perhaps they were feeling uncomfortable after the excitement died down and it was time to actually go to sleep. My boys never could give me a straight up answer as to why they wanted to come home other than, “I want to sleep in my own bed.”

    They have friends over on the weekends – it’s not unusual to see 5 teenage boys all over 5’8″ strewn all over the bed and the floor of my kids’ bedrooms. It secretly makes ME feel better having them here – where I can see them and still love on them – and I love that they are comfortable enough to have their friends be a part of our family for the weekend as well. (There’s no such thing as an overnight with these boys – it’s the entire weekend … and that usually includes feeding the masses as well!)

  2. I gotta say also – I freaking love love love that bunk bed setup!!! I could totally fit about 6 teenage boys comfortably on that sucker! Would be great not having to step over bodies when I walk into the kids’ bedrooms ha ha ha!!

  3. edmontonjb says

    My older kids have sleepovers at least once a month but they both prefer to have friends over at our house rather than stay away. One of my sons sleep walks very occasionally and once woke up during a sleepover at a friends house and he was under the parents bed!


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